Cracker Wha?

On Wednesday’s Oprah that Melissa live blogged, she lost interest during the Dylan’s Candy Bar segment, but not me! I loves me some simple carbohydrates. I couldn’t wait to see Oprah’s reaction to the different kinds of candy. Here are my notes:

Pixy Stix Yes, Oprah likey the Pixy Stix. She chomped on grape one—my favorite flavor—during the segment. I knew we were candy soulmates. (Did anyone else ever snort lines of Pixy dust like I did?)

Conversation Hearts Oprah realized this candy sucks and moved on quickly to…

Pez Interestingly, Oprah said: “We didn’t have these in my neighborhood growing up!” As to say to Dylan Lauren: “Hey, you white rich daddy’s girl! Where I grew up, we po' people couldn't afford Pez.”

Tootsie Roll Oprah sings the Tootsie Roll jingle. This moment makes me uncomfortable.

Baby Ruth When Baby Ruth is introduced to the audience, it garners applause from the crowd. Huh? Do people actually even buy this candy? The only people I know who like Baby Ruth are my Grandpa and my Dad. And my Grandpa is dead. Translation: people who like Baby Ruth are old.

Cracker Jack The crowd went WILD when it came to Cracker Jack. It was if they were at a "Favorite Things" show. This reaction dumbfounded me even more than the Baby Ruth appreciation. I mean, all Cracker Jack is a cheap cardboard box filled with stale caramel popcorn and peanuts. And forget the glorious “prize” in the box. These days, it’s usually a tattoo of a bumblebee or a dinosaur.

So, that was the candy segment. Surprise, surprise -- the crowd got a bunch of free candy. But, honestly, this assortment of candy is all the crappy candy you wish you never got trick or treating.